adoption – Renew Inspiration Mind Body Spirit

And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; And patience, experience, and experience, hope. (Romans 5:3-4)

Thought for Today

Trust the wait. Embrace the uncertainty. Enjoy the beauty of becoming. When nothing is certain, anything is possible.

Welcome to Renew Inspiration! I am so glad you decided to read my blog on today. I want to spend some time talking about patience. Unfortunately, patience in life is not spread evenly amongst people. Some of us have it, and some of us don’t. According to the Webster Dictionary, patience is the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset; to wait or to do something despite difficulties or to suffer without complaining.

Everything comes to you. In the right moment. Be patient. Be grateful. – Unknown

Well, what does patience mean to you? As we go through life, we often take a lot of things for granted. For example, do you have patience with yourself when you are dieting or exercising? Do you have patience with your family as it relates to doing household chores, doing school work, going to various appointments during the week, participating in school events or running errands on the weekend? How about your co-workers helping you meet important deadlines for projects at work? Now, let’s take a moment to think about your personal behavior. Do you find yourself screaming a lot, losing your temper, or always stressed out about something? The real question should be, do you have patience hidden within?

Let’s Get Personal

For ye have need of patience, that, after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise. (Hebrews 10:36)

Honestly, I consider myself to have lots of patience, but lately I find myself wondering how much patience I really do have. Well, my husband and I adopted 2 boys with the hopes of giving them lots of love, positive support, and helping them become more independent in life. Yes, we want the same dreams for our boys as you have for your children. We want them to be successful in school, play sports, learn karate, play video games, and enjoy their favorite hobby. Both of our adopted sons have a hearing impairment, but we do not allow it to define our children. Both boys attend speech therapy and behavioral therapy regularly.

When we adopted our children, I knew it would be a struggle because of the adoption itself, the unknown factors involved with their history of abuse, the boys being developmentally delayed, and the hearing impairment. After years of therapy and the cochlear implant in 2016, we came to realize that these factors help define our children. I truly understand that. However, I was not prepared for all the negative energy that the oldest child is bringing into our household. Unfortunately, he is defiant (disrespects, lies, don’t follow directions, sneaky, failing grades). I don’t think you can ever prepare yourself wholeheartedly. After all, you have opened your home and your hearts to strangers. You have sacrificed so much to provide things for these children that they probably would have never had in their young lives. You are willing to love them despite their past trauma and living situations. In most cases, you don’t even know what the children really went through in their young lives. It takes a lot of patience to parent children I am sure you already know, but it takes even more patience when you have negative factors playing a huge role in the dynamics of your family unit.

I wanted to provide you with a real life example because I am living with this lack of patience every single day. To take it a step further, I noticed that I began struggling with patience especially after my mother passed away in 2015. She was my ROCK, my strongest supporter, my EVERYTHING. She encouraged me and always complimented how well I worked with our boys through their personal struggles. So, as I write this blog today, I ask myself the very same question that I asked you earlier, do I have patience hidden within?

Patience is not the ability to wait but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting. – Unknown

When I decided to blog, I wanted my blogs to be different. I want to impact your lives in a unique way. I want you to think about your life and how you can make positive changes as you read my blog. I want to impact your life in a positive way. Remember, to grow from within, sometimes you press yourself to move out of your comfort zone and be willing to feel awkward. Yes, you may feel uncomfortable when evaluating your current living situation or when trying to change something for the better, but that’s when you know the best is yet to come. Don’t be afraid to be different. Don’t be afraid to be alone. You are not alone while going through this process. Well, it’s time for you to get your journal or notebook out so you can start the necessary work.

Symptoms When You’re Impatient

How do you know when you’re being impatient? You will probably experience one or more of the following symptoms:

• Shallow breathing (short breaths)

• Muscle tension

• Hand clenching/Tightening

• Restless feet

• Irritability/Anger

• Rushing /Quick decisions

Patience is the calm acceptance that things can happen in a different order than the one you have in mind. – David G. Allen

Ways to Manage the Symptoms

Here’s some strategies to help you manage symptoms for patience:

• Take deep slow breaths, and count to 10.

• Focus on relaxing your body.

• Learn to manage your emotions.

• Force yourself to slow down.

• Practice active listening and empathetic listening.

Patience is a form of wisdom. It demonstrates that we understand and accept the fact that sometimes things must unfold in their own time. – Jon Kabat-Zinn

Journal Prompts – Ways to Work on Patience in your Life

• What does patience mean to you?

• What gives you patience and why?

• Do you believe in something most people don’t? If so, what keeps you believing?

• What future challenge are you most looking forward to and why?

• What is the best way to show patience to family? friends? strangers?

Prayer for When You Are Waiting and Feel Impatient

Heavenly Father, I know I am impatient, so prone to worry, to give up, to lose hope. Please help me to rest in your promises on today. In this season of waiting, renew my joy in this moment so that I do not miss your presence in this place. Thank you for never giving up on me. Thank you for love, your guidance, and your glory even when I cannot see. In Jesus Mighty Name, AMEN.

I WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU

So, what’s your story as it relates to patience? Think about your life right now where you are. Describe a situation or a person in which you wish you showed more patience? Don’t be afraid to comment or ask a question. WE all learn from other people’s struggles and life experiences. Help can be found if you take the first step today. I will be waiting patiently for your comments and/or any questions you have. Believe in yourself today, tomorrow, and forever!

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Renew Inspiration has given me my inner voice to express my thoughts toward important topics that are dear to my heart. Thank you for spending this time with me on today. I don’t take your time for granted so allow my words to bless you and resonate in your spirit on today. Come along with me on this journey to experience my inner voice.

I didn’t give you the gift of life, life gave me the gift of you -Unknown

My inner voice cries out for all the children who are neglected and abused. My heart opens up for children who needs to be nurtured and loved despite their rough backgrounds. My thoughts are always racing about ways I can help children overcome obstacles that was not no fault of their own. Even though your inner voice cries out, you know that you are unable to help or save them all, so what do you do?

Where there is great love, there are always miracles -Unknown

My inner voice cries out for not just my own children who were adopted at a young age, but I strive to make a positive impact on the lives of every child I come into contact with. Some days your smile, your kind words, uplifting compliment or just a kind gesture are the only positive moments a child may experience throughout their busy day. Once again, I realize I cannot reach them all, so what do you do?

God knew that it doesn’t matter how your children get to your family. It just matters that they get there. -Kira Mortenson

My inner voice cries out for children who were blessed to find a loving family to take them into a safe and loving home, but to a child that has experienced abuse and/or neglect it’s hard for them to adjust properly due to the trauma of their pasts. In some cases, the new parents have no idea what the child has experienced, therefore it is difficult to help the child cope with his or her feelings. Sometimes it takes more than a prayer, hot meal, a warm hug, or a kind word to make these children feel the love that you are willing to share.

Let’s stay here for a moment. Now, what is happening right now, in this very moment. There is a new family unit being built with a foundation of love, prayer, and positive support. So that should be enough, right? Unfortunately, I can speak to this from my current experience. I call this creative parenting because you have to make adjustments daily in order to meet the child where they are for that moment. Even outside therapy sessions are not enough to deal with the emotional stress that families experience when trauma was introduced to children at young, tender ages.

We do not need to know the beginning of a child’s story to change the ending -Fi Newood

With that being said, my inner voice cries out to all parents who have sacrificed everything in order to provide for their children, both biological and adopted. The willingness to put your life on hold in order to provide a positive structure and future for a child shows your character. The child’s total well-being is always in the forefront of your mind. I strive to advocate for both of my sons each and every day. When children have special needs, it’s even another layer of difficulty put on the family unit. You have to make sure that the necessary resources and time is set into place not only at home, but also at school and extracurricular activities, such as sports, clubs, hobbies, etc. You are the voice for your children and must advocate for them in every waking moment. In return, you must teach your children how to advocate for themselves as well.

My inner voice cries out each and every day that I wake up knowing that I am responsible for two children that look up to me waiting on direction and guidance. It’s not always easy, but the experience strengthens you and changes your life forever. Let’s not give up on our children throughout our journey called life. Help support our children who may not have the positive support at home. Be a mentor, volunteer at your local schools, volunteer at local youth agencies, be a foster care parent, or even adopt a child. There are so many ways to give back to those children who need it most. I do realize WE cannot save them all, but even if we save one, that’s better than doing nothing at all.

Tag: adoption

Patience Hidden Within