Forgiveness is the greatest gift you can give yourself. – Maya Angelou

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Welcome back to Renew Inspiration! So, how’s 2022 treating you so far? There’s a lot going on in my life right now, some good things mixed with some bad. Despite all of this, I am still committed to writing inspirational blog posts that will help you work through some of your challenging life problems. One topic that keeps stirring in my spirit is the act of forgiveness.

Let’s begin our discussion by defining forgiveness. Forgiveness means that you accept the behavior, you accept what has happened, and you are willing to move past it, and move on with your life without worrying about past events that cannot be changed. Often times this process is easier said than done.

REASONS WHY PEOPLE STRUGGLE WITH FORGIVENESS

Forgive people in your life, even those who are not sorry for their actions. Holding on to anger only hurts you, not them. – Unknown Author

When you’re dealing with forgiveness, it’s important for you to:

• Recognize how you truly feel in the inside concerning the person involved or the situation.
• Learn to accept your feelings and where you are right now in this very moment.
• Make a plan to take action so you can move on from this hurtful place.

Forgiveness is an extremely hard process to work through. Most of the time people struggle with identifying the various emotions that their feeling, such as anger, guilt, shame, etc.

Here’s some other reasons why people struggle with the act of forgiveness. People are:

• Scared that forgiveness may justify the pain and hurt that was caused.
• Not ready to grieve the experience so they can accept and let go.
• Worried that by forgiving the person involved we make ourselves more vulnerable to being hurt again.
• Scared to face and process their emotions in regard to what happened.
• Refusing to forgive so they can maintain a false sense of control over the experience or person.

The struggles people may experience related to forgiveness are real. Remember, you don’t have to go through this process alone. Contact your doctor, join a local support group or find a licensed therapist in your area.

IMPROVE YOUR LIFE THROUGH FORGIVENESS

True forgiveness is when you can say ‘Thank you for that experience’. – Oprah Winfrey

Although forgiveness seems to be difficult for most people to do, when it’s done consistently it can improve your life. However, before you attempt the act of forgiveness, take a moment to reflect over the situation and consider what it is you’re trying to get out of this process. The concept of forgiveness doesn’t mean that you condone what happened or that the person involved is blameless. It’s making the conscious choice to release yourself from the burden, pain, and stress of holding on to resentment.

Grab your journal. Write down the following questions and your answers.

• What do you want to receive from the forgiveness experience?
• Why do you feel the need to forgive the person or situation?
• Who are you really doing this for?
• Will you be able to handle the result even if it’s not in your favor?

Now, let’s look at some ways to improve your life through forgiveness.

• Be prepared to take back your power over the situation. Don’t allow anyone or anything to control your happiness. You have the power to overcome and reach your destiny.
• Be honest with yourself and feel your pain. Give yourself permission to acknowledge and honor the pain that’s real in your life. Then, make a plan to release it.
• Name the feelings and emotions you’re feeling. Whether you hurt yourself or have been hurt by someone else, allow yourself to name the feelings and emotions. Some examples may include guilt, grief, shame, regret, sadness, anxiety, panic, fear, confusion, numbness, etc.
• Have patience because forgiveness is a practice. Show yourself patience and grace as you navigate through this experience. Nothing changes overnight. It takes time and a commitment to practice forgiveness.
• Set healthy boundaries. It’s important to nurture yourself throughout this process. Set healthy boundaries and only allow people to be a part of your life or space that respect you on every level. This is not a compromise.

Always remember, taking action can help you to facilitate healing and make you feel more empowered over the situation.

FORGIVENESS AFFIRMATIONS

Forgive yourself, you are not perfect. Show yourself grace, you are still learning. Show yourself patience, you are on a journey. – Shannon Yvette Tanner

Forgiveness is a process. If you’re feeling resentment. Let it go. If you’re feeling anger. Let it go. Just like you would show someone else patience, compassion, and grace, make sure to do the same thing for yourself.

Now, repeat after me:

I will take small steps towards making peace with my past. Every day is an opportunity to do it better, an opportunity to become a better version of myself.

• Forgiveness is a gift I give myself.
• I am worthy of forgiveness.
• I accept that I am human, and I make mistakes.
• I forgive myself for the hurt I’ve caused.
• I accept my shortcomings and forgive myself.
• I forgive myself for not knowing what I know now.
• I have the power to forgive everyone who cause me pain and heartache.
• I let go of unforgiveness, grudges, and malice.
• I am proud of who I am – strong, powerful, limitless, and courageous.
• I am ready to get out of my comfort zone and explore the opportunity of forgiveness.

As you practice working with the pain that’s there, you grow key strengths of self-compassion, courage, and empathy that inevitably make you stronger in every way. Now, breathe in and say I acknowledge the pain, hurt, and heartache. Breathe out and say I am forgiving and releasing this burden from mind, heart, and soul. Forgiveness allows me to be happy today, tomorrow, and every day of my life.

TIME FOR REFLECTION – JOURNAL PROMPTS

Remember when you forgive, you heal. And when you let go, you grow. – Unknown Author

Journaling is a powerful way to process events in your life, build self-awareness, get more clarity, and keep yourself on track. Journaling also allows for past reflection, future insight, and present surrender. Keep in mind that this is a journey, and everyone takes their own path.  Ready, set, write!

• How does forgiveness improve your life?
• Why is it so hard to ask for forgiveness?
• Who do you need to forgive?
• Why is it important for you to forgive others?
• What do you need to be forgiven for?
• How does withholding forgiveness serve you?
• How would your life change if you practiced forgiveness on a regular basis?

SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS

Sharing is caring. I would love to hear from you. Please answer these questions in the comment section. You never know, your comment may help someone else along their journey. What will happen once you forgive another person? What is the best part of forgiving? What is the hardest part of forgiving? What resonates with you after reading this blog post?

Believe in yourself today, tomorrow and forever!

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