11 Ways to Cope with Grief During the Holiday Season

The loneliest walk you’ll ever take is the one down the road of grief. – Author Unknown

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Thought to Ponder – The “happy holidays” can be the least wonderful time of the year when we are mourning the death of a loved one.

Welcome back to Renew Inspiration! I am truly lost and broken on today. It has been 7 years since my beautiful mother left her earthly body to be in heaven. I realize deep in my heart that she is in a better place where she will no longer be in pain while struggling to breathe due to suffering from severe COPD. I watched her change from an independent, vibrant, and feisty woman to one who struggled to care for herself on a daily basis. Watching her go through this terrible transition honestly broke me down to my core. It hurt me so much because I could not do anything to help her overcome this awful illness that she had to endure. Instead of staying in this deep depression and dark state, I chose to create this safe space to inspire others through my gift of writing.

11 WAYS TO COPE WITH GRIEF DURING THE HOLIDAY SEASON

Missing you comes in waves, tonight I’m drowning. – Unknown Author

The holidays can be a time of sadness, pain, anger or dread for anyone dealing with an illness, grief or the loss of a loved one. Unfortunately, grief can also magnify the stress that is often already felt during the holidays. On the other hand, it’s important to note that it’s alright to have a good time in spite of your grief. Just allow yourself to feel whatever your heart is feeling in the moment and have your trusted support team established.

Here’s 11 effective ways to cope with grief during the holiday season:

Be patient with yourself and others – The grief process can be exhausting and overwhelming. Be patient with yourself and extend that same compassion and understanding to others.
Offer yourself some grace – Give yourself permission to feel whatever it is you’re feeling. If you feel sad, allow the tears to come; if you feel angry, allow yourself to vent some steam in a safe manner.
Be kind to yourself – Be sure to get plenty of rest and nourishment you need; do not take on more than you can handle; if you need to be alone, then honor that. If you desire the affection of others, seek it out.
Openly communicate your preferences to others – Be prepared to have an open dialogue with your family and friends to ensure everyone’s grief is acknowledged. This would be a great time to determine if the holiday tradition will continue or if everyone will create a new tradition.
Ask for and accept help – It’s okay to tell your loved ones the best way that they can help you during this difficult time. Remember, ask and you shall receive.
Set healthy boundaries – Give yourself permission to “do things differently” this year as needed and choose to participate only if you’re ready and feel comfortable.
Focus on what you can control – Observe your surroundings and relationships. Then, do what makes you happy.
Find a way to honor your memories – Create a special way to memorialize your loved one. For example, light a candle, arrange to have a prayer vigil, release balloons, plant a tree, or create a stone garden.
Find support – Sharing your feelings is often the best way to get through them and finding people you can talk to will help. Family and friends can be a great support during times of grief. If they are unavailable, seek professional help from a licensed therapist, a grief counselor or grief support group in your area.
Acknowledge your grief reactions – It’s important to acknowledge that this season you may look or feel different. You may encounter the inevitable waves of grief and/or you may be surprised by moments of love, joy or hope.
Make a difference in your community – Give to your favorite charity organization or purchase a gift for a needy child. Consider volunteering at a nursing home, hospital, hospice, children’s shelter or soup kitchen. This can help you cope with your grief by contributing to the greater good within your community.

Keep in mind, the best gift you can give anyone you love is that of being true to yourself and living your life to the fullest, even as you adjust to the loss of a loved one during the holidays.

GRIEF AFFIRMATIONS

Grief can be the garden of compassion. If you keep your heart open through everything, your pain can become your greatest ally in your life’s search for love and wisdom. – Rumi

In order for you to experience the power of grief affirmations, it is important for you to feed your spirit with love and include grief affirmations in your daily routine. For example, I choose to feel good about myself and life’s journey each day. Even when I am feeling sad or depressed, deep inside I aspire to be a giver. A giver of life, a giver of hope, and a giver of strength. This kind of thinking will help you overcome life’s challenges, such as grief, and improve your overall well-being.

Here’s some grief affirmations to help you get started on your journey to healing:

In my sadness, I have learned to love and care for myself.
I acknowledge that I am never alone in my grief.
I treat myself with kindness, respect and compassion.
I allow myself to feel my grief and then let go.
I take comfort in the memories of my loved one.
I am thankful and feel fortunate to have known you.
I give myself time and space to grieve, process my feelings, and heal.
I appreciate how much love and positivity my loved one brought to this world.
I am patience with my healing process.
I trust in the healing process and remain confident.
I will give myself time to heal and remain optimistic about the future.
I embrace my experiences and know acceptance is the first step to finding peace within.

Repeat the grief affirmations 1 to 2 times per day so it will be a constant reminder of what you are aiming for. Shift your focus and attention towards thoughts and feelings that are both positive and constructive. Start using these affirmations along with journal prompts today, and watch the quality of your life improve throughout your journey. Focus on positive changes and you will get positive results. With time, I know I will learn to live and express myself differently, but for now writing is my escape. Have a safe and wonderful holiday season!

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JOURNAL PROMPTS

I love journaling because it is a safe place for me to put my feelings and emotions into words, then put my words into action. Remember, journaling is your very own personal journey throughout life, your ups and downs, your successes, and failures. Journaling also allows for past reflection, future insight, and present surrender. Ready, set, write!

What is happening in your mind right now in this very moment?
What do you know to be true in this moment?
Why are you grieving?
What is your fondest memory of your loved one?
Why do you feel lost and broken on today?
What was your high and low for today?
What is one of life’s little pleasures that you appreciate?
What is something you would love to learn in your lifetime?
Some of your grief triggers are ___________________.

SHARING WITH ONE ANOTHER

Let’s talk. Believe it or not, writing my feelings out in a journal or on my Renew Inspiration blog helps me sort out my thoughts. I’m able to release the hurt, loneliness, pain, anger, and heartache all in one place without judgment. Have you ever felt lost, lonely and broken throughout life? How do you cope with grief during the holidays? If so, how did you cope with your grief and pain? Do you plan to use grief affirmations to improve your life? If you haven’t done so already, do you plan to add affirmations and writing in your journal to your daily routine? Please share your thoughts in the comments section. I look forward to reading your feedback!

Believe in yourself today, tomorrow, and forever!