I didn’t give you the gift of life, life gave me the gift of you. – Unknown Author

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Thought to Ponder – Those who think there is a time limit when grieving, have never lost a piece of their heart.

Welcome back to Renew Inspiration! In case you were wondering, I took a mental health break to gather my thoughts, feelings, and emotions. Today, my mother would have been 80 years old, but she passed away in December 2015. This has been a stressful time for me, to say the least. However, I want you to know that I appreciate you and all of the support you give to my writing and blogging platform.

5 STAGES OF GRIEF & LOSS – On Death and Dying written by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

Loss and heartache do not define you. They are part of your story. – Unknown Author

Even though there are 5 stages of grief and loss, people who are grieving do not necessarily go through the stages in the same order or experience all of them. The stages of grief and mourning are universal in nature and are experienced by people from all walks of life, across many cultures. Mourning occurs in our lives in response to an individual’s own terminal illness, the loss of a close relationship, or to the death of a valued being, human or animal. While mourning, we spend different lengths of time working through each step and express each stage with different levels of intensity. Here’s the 5 stages of grief and loss as defined by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross:

• Denial & Isolation – The first reaction is to deny and isolate yourself from the reality of the situation. Most people block out the painful words and hide from the facts. Some people will believe that nothing is of any value any more, not even life itself. For most people, this stage of grief and loss is a temporary response that carries us through the first wave of pain.
• Anger – As denial and isolation leaves us, reality and its pain re-emerge. Now, the intense emotion people feel turns into anger. The anger may be toward objects, complete strangers, friends or family. Even though deep down inside the person knows this feeling of anger is wrong, they may even be directing it toward dying or deceased loved ones as well.
• Bargaining – In the next stage, there are feelings of helplessness and vulnerability as a way to regain control through a series of “if only” statements, such as “If only we had sought medical attention sooner” or “If only we got a second opinion from another doctor.” Unfortunately, this is an attempt to bargain with God or our higher power in order to postpone our pain. Guilt often accompanies bargaining as well. The person believes there was something they could have done differently to have helped save their loved ones’ life.
• Depression – In the next stage, the person may start to be overwhelmed with sadness or regret which turns into worry. This phase may be eased by simple reassurance from others around them. Another phase of depression is when the person is more private and tries to bid a farewell to their loved one in silence. In this case, a hug or a kind gesture will comfort them.
• Acceptance – Reaching this stage of grieving is a gift not afforded to everyone. Death may be sudden and unexpected, or we may never see beyond our anger or denial. Unfortunately, this phase is marked by withdrawal and calm.

Please keep in mind that everyone grieves differently. There is no right or wrong way. Some people will wear their emotions on their face and be outwardly emotional. Other people will experience their grief more internally and may not cry at all. Remember, do not judge how a person choose to experience grief, as each person will experience it differently.

WAYS TO NURTURE YOUR MIND, BODY & SPIRIT WHILE COPING WITH GRIEF

You must learn to master a new way to think before you can master a new way to be. – Marianne Williamson

Sometimes I wish time would stand still and I don’t have to relive the pain that comes during this time of the year. While everyone else is excited for the holidays, I dread it with everything within me. The holidays are just not the same without my mother physically being here. No amount of journaling or therapy sessions will save you from the emotional turmoil that you experience and continue to feel throughout the grieving process.

Nevertheless, I’ve learned that it’s important to nurture your mind, body and spirit while coping with grief. Here’s a few different ways to help you get started along this journey:

• Read and study God’s Word.
• Seek God’s face each day through prayer and guided meditation.
• Pray a specific prayer for positive change in and around your life.
• Practice mindfulness and stay in the present.
• Set personal goals and a plan to achieve them.
• Fuel your body with healthy food options.
• Exercise daily and/or try new yoga poses.
• Change your mental focus and environment.
• Setup a daily routine using a To-Do List.
• Focus on gratitude and find what you are grateful for each day.
• Write in your journal to get your thoughts on to paper and out of your head.
• Make time for self-reflection. Go for a walk, read, listen to music, meditate or color.

However, if you feel your mental stability is getting worse throughout the grieving process, seek professional help in the form of therapy from a licensed therapist or social worker, medication to treat depression or anxiety, or support groups to help share your feelings with like-minded individuals.

AFFIRMATIONS TO HELP YOU NAVIGATE LIFE

Affirmations can be used to change your current mindset, boost your self-confidence, mood, and self-esteem. Through the power of repetition, you’re able to reconstruct your thought patterns, beliefs, and ideals in your subconscious mind. I will allow change to take place in my life on today. I plan to water my roots, so my soul can blossom. Now repeat after me:

• In my sadness, I love myself.
• It’s okay to take time to grieve.
• I am patient with my healing process.
• I allow myself to grieve then move on.
• I feel my angels holding me today as I grieve.
• I will embrace change in my life.
• I will step out on faith throughout my journey.
• I plan to endure and overcome heartache, pain, suffering, sadness and loneliness.
• I am finding strength in myself as I grieve.
• I focus on my blessings, goals and memories.
• I will commit to improving my personal well-being.
• I am gentle with myself as I heal.
• I release my resistance to this situation.
• I graciously accept help when its offered.
• The universe lifts me, supports me and guides me.

Unfortunately, many of us struggle to overcome many obstacles in life, such as grief, and don’t understand that the root cause is often times hidden within. Whether you sometimes feel stressed out, anxious, sad or depressed, there’s one important fact that you need to remember. You need to learn that your mind, body and spirit must become ONE in order for you to be at your best. Only then, will you begin to navigate life while coping with grief.

TIME FOR REFLECTION – JOURNAL PROMPTS

To the mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders. – Lao Tzu

Keep calm and write on. Journaling is a powerful way to process events in your life, build self-awareness, get more clarity, and keep yourself on track. Journaling also allows for past reflection, future insight, and present surrender. Keep in mind that this is a journey, and everyone takes their own path. Ready, set, write!

MIND

• How can you create a space to help clear your mind?
• What are some of your mental obstacles in life that are holding you back?
• Our passion is typically something that brings us pleasure. What are some of your most passionate thoughts and how do you nurture them?
• What is your greatest quest in life?

BODY

• Sit or stand very still. What are you feeling right now in this very moment?
• What are you having a hard time accepting in your life?
• What are your strengths and weaknesses?
• How are you mistreating your body or compromising your health?

 SPIRIT

• What steps do I need to take to become spiritually grounded in God’s Word?
• What is holding you back from trusting and believing in God?
• Does my life reflect what my heart desire? If not, what changes can I make?
• How do you plan to feed your spirit on today?

JOURNAL TO OVERCOME GRIEF: A PERSONAL JOURNEY TO HEALING

No matter how bad your heart is broken, the world doesn’t stop for your grief. – Faraaz Kazi

Journal To Overcome Grief: A Personal Journey to Healing can be purchased via Amazon.com.  This beautiful grief journal includes thought provoking journal prompts and quotes that will help you navigate life after loss.

There will be times when you’ll want to cry and other times when you’ll smile as you explore your personal reflections. This is a unique way to honor your loved one and connect with their spirit through writing while creating your own personal keepsake for years to come.

SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS

We all are different and unique, but I do know that our minds, bodies, and spirit must be as ONE in order for us to feel complete. What are some things you do to help calm your mind, body, and spirit? I look forward to reading your comments and feedback!

Believe in yourself today, tomorrow, and forever!

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